Newly Retired

The other night I overheard a conversation while I was sitting in a restaurant. The woman had recently retired. She said rather forlornly, “I can’t get out of my nightgown in the morning.” I glanced across the aisle to see her dazed expression. Like a slap across the face to wake me up, it forced me to think of when I first sold my bookshop.

I was in the habit of working 5 ½ to 6 days a week. In December it was always seven days of ten-hours-a-day with only Christmas Day off. The day after was just as busy as the day before. No complaint. I loved it. And then I sold the business with plans to start a brand new adventure by moving out of state.

In the meantime I woke in the morning with no destination, no demands on my time, no need to be anywhere in particular. I woke in the morning without having to jump into the shower and rush to get ready. I was in shock without knowing it. All these great blocks of time were in front of me and I didn’t know how to respond to them. It was like being in the middle of a joyful festival then being plunked away and put into solitary.

O f course it passed. Soon memorable lunch dates, dinner parties and outings came before the frenzy of packing up, closing accounts, etc. but it was that shock of ‘dead time’ that I vividly remember.